“Someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business.” Let me say that again for the people in the cheap seats” – Rachel Hollis, Girl, Wash Your Face
Please say that again. Repeat it so many times that you start to believe it. I started listening to the audible version of “Girl Wash Your Face” and I feel like I found my blogger/social media/author spirit animal/soul mate. Rachel writes about her experience with life and aspires to inspire and motivate women.
I’m about halfway through the book and each chapter is better than the last. My favorite part of the book so far is where she talks about something her therapist told her as a young girl.
“Someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business.“
First of all. My therapist tells me this ALL the time, so kudos to the great therapists that hold us women together.
Second of all. Wow. This quote speaks to me on so many levels.
We are always so worried about what people think of us. Truth of the matter is, people are entitled to their opinions on books, politics, music, movies AND what they think about you.
As humans, its in our nature to wonder (and worry) about how we are viewed. Society is cruel. High school was cruel. The workplace can be cruel. Sometimes so cruel that it gives us so much anxiety we are unable to perform our daily functions.
I’m pretty sure every woman has been called fat or ugly at some point in their lives. (By the way, you are not fat or ugly. You are perfect just the way you are in every way.) Now, those asshole guys from high school that called you fat brought your confidence DOWN. You used to love summer and being at the beach. Now you wont be caught dead wearing shorts, let alone a bathing suit.
You may have a really difficult co-worker that just doesn’t get you. Everything you do, they have to criticize. Everytime you try to help or develop or bond with your team, they think youre kissing ass. Reality check: you’re just being a good person and doing what makes YOU happy. But because of the judgement, you decide to back down and not lead the way anymore.
I’m sure you have dealt with judgement at least once in your lifetime, if not hundreds of times. It’s not about what these people think of you. It’s how you react to it.
“So and so called me fat.”
“This one thinks Im a kiss ass.”
“Another one thinks Im a bitch.”
“Did he just call me stupid?”
“They always said Ill never get anywhere in life.”
The most successful and happiest of people do not let people’s opinions of them get in their way. Let’s take the most beautiful and amazing plus size model for example. Ashley Graham. Many people have called her fat. She did NOT let what people say get in her way. She’s been on TONS of magazine covers and even on the cover of Sports Illustrated. She didn’t let the assholes get in her way.
The female business owner was always told she would never amount to anything because she is a woman. Because she doesn’t have an education. Because all she knows how to do is be a mom. Day in and day out she was criticizing by people around her. Dealt with HR related issues for being treated unfairly and even struggled with unfair pay because she was a woman. She did not let these people’s thoughts get to her or get in her way. She did what SHE wanted to do and what she was nade to do.
My point is simple.
The act ? Not so simple. It takes TIME and EFFORT to practice not giving a shit about what people think of you. It takes patience and lots of falling down and picking yourself up again, to not listen to words that shouldn’t concern you.
Start off small. Keep a picture of the quote “Someone else’s opinion of you is none of your business” as your background on your phone. Remind yourself day in and day out that their opinions are invalid and mean absolutely nothing. Eventually, you won’t even be phased by most of the negative talk.
After all, the only opinions that matter, will be given to you with the purest of intentions by the most amazing, loving people in your life, that want to see you succeed.
Crazy to think that there’s people that want to see you happy, right?